Watching shows from behind a screen can only give you so much. Footage that looks tame on YouTube feels much different in reality. That sense of danger can never be replicated. You don’t need to shield your arms against some flying arm constantly. Documentation is important, but it is not everything. The videos from a hardcore fest are interspersed between every other bit of information in the feed you’ve curated. Occasionally, footage will stick in my head if it is particularly gnarly looking.
There are days when I have been overwhelmed by the flow of information coming at me at once. A new release will come out, and everyone is simultaneously saying to listen to it or say it is the best thing ever. It has made the act of discovery exhausting. It leaves me in a position where I am directly at odds with something I love. I love absorbing as much about music as possible, whether it is new or old. On Monday, I found an Instagram page for a Buffalo hardcore zine sharing a demo from a band called No Joke from 1990; it sounds of the time, taking some of the late 80s New York rhythms as inspirations. I don’t know if I will remember it; that doesn’t matter. I am just glad it exists, and there are people out there who feel passionately about something that, according to dumb Spotify metrics, only a few people have listened to in the past month. But it doesn’t change that checking out new music has sometimes left me with a profound emptiness, giving me the same feeling as watching several movies in a day.
FYA served as a reigniting my passion for all things new music. I spent the first week feverishly looking for new music on Bandcamp. There were some releases that I liked. Others made me wish I never heard an instrumental intro ever again. In the airport on my way to Florida, a certain hardcore musician said something to the effect of that FYA is like another show in a good way. If you allow me to be a little “woo-woo,” I felt that the true essence of hardcore was captured. The venue felt closer to a VFW hall with lights on. I didn’t see any advertisements beyond stuff for Trail of Lies and the upcoming Collateral record. The musicians are within your reach. As I left on Sunday, I asked Ben Cook from No Warning about playing Suffer Survive songs. I talked to a member of Restraining Order and quickly bonded over a love of The Replacements. It was the embodiment of a refrain I hear constantly from bands that there is no barrier between the musicians and the audience. It sometimes feels hollow, but FYA was one of the few times the message made sense recently.
Not everything was perfect about FYA. Playing in an untraditional venue comes with drawbacks. There were moments when I was disinterested in what I was watching. It doesn’t matter. I’ll take the shit that annoys the fuck out of me every day for those highs I felt at various times. Here are a couple of my favorite moments. Some are good; others are fun stories in retrospect that I would like to bury away for decades, only to uncover them to seem cool to some random person when I fully become the old dude in the back complaining about new jacks.
11. Getting Hit Within Seconds of Never Ending Game's Set
Never Ending Game is one of my favorite hardcore bands right now. Most of the time, I have stood and watched them from afar. I did not want to risk getting hit. I thought I had enough distance from the pit, but slowly, the wall of people in front of me began to shrink. Within ten seconds of their first song, I took an elbow to the eye during a side-to-side part. My vision was spotty, and my right eye started tearing up. I got out of the way because I had no idea how bad it was. I didn’t want to risk any other injury. I am smart enough to know I can’t hang with all the burly dancers NEG brings out. It was not fun as it was happening. But, it is part of the allure of heavy and hard music. There will be violent results occasionally.
10. Watching Old Posi Numbers Clips With Eli Enis At The Air BnB
Watching YouTube videos with your friends is one of life's most intimate experiences and a rite of passage as a hardcore kid. I was so exhausted and still stinging from getting hit during NEG that I skipped Sunami and headed to our Air BnB. I immediately forced Eli to watch sets from Posi Numbers, a hardcore fest in the 2000s. I showed him the Mental/Dumptruck set, which is iconic to me. Eli mentioned how different the moshing looked, which was interesting to me. We then hopped around, watching a Carry On set from 2001 and a Cro-Mags one from 2002. Having the experience of watching old hardcore footage with a friend made me wish I followed through with writing about every Posi Numbers set from 2003.
9. Florida Bands Having Crazy Reactions/Hometown Pride
Part of the fun of going to these fests is seeing people go wild for their local scene. There was plenty of that, ranging from Three Knee Deep at the pre-show to people singing along to Collaterall on day two of the fest. It gave me a lot of respect for South Florida hardcore and has me looking forward to coming back as soon as I can.
8. Getting a Bunch of Merch From All 4 All After Their Set
It is pretty rare that a set drives me to buy merch, but All 4 All’s did that for me. It is the kind of hardcore I am especially into right now. It is two-steppy, energetic and fast. I also found it endearing how much the band cares about their hometown. When I grabbed a zine from their merch booth, they asked if I was in a band and told me to come to Syracuse. That level of enthusiasm made me want to dig deeper and see what Syracuse has to offer. Most people may associate the city with Earth Crisis and the heavier fare of the 90s. But as the band pointed out in an interview with Stronger Than Pride #3, there is much more to be found. It just requires a deeper level of engagement.
While grabbing a zine from Fortress Records, I quickly talked to the guy behind the label about democore. Most of what has come out on Fortress seems to be in conversation with stuff like Moshers Delight and IOU Records. He took the comment in good fun, saying he’d like to put out other stuff as well, as he likes all kinds of hardcore. It was a good reminder of the difference between our perceptions as fans versus people making art or trying to make a scene happen.
6. Singing Along To Behind These Walls by No Warning at 1am
I had never seen No Warning before. The whole aftershow lineup was great, too. XnomadX and Grand Scheme were the openers. It felt a little light on attendance with maybe 75 people there. It made it feel a little more special. The people who were there were very passionate. It also made it possible that I could sing to my favorite No Warning songs with relative ease. On some days, I believe “Behind These Walls” is the greatest hardcore song ever written.
5. Moshing Into Your Friends
This one is self-explanatory. There is something wonderful about inflicting harm on your friends in a very harmless way.
4. Balmora and The Continued Growth of Ephyra Records
I am almost tired of how much I have talked about Balmora and Ephyra Records. I cannot help it; it is responsible for some of my favorite music of 2023. I love it so much that Eli and I got to FYA at the doors opening to get merch. All of the big sizes were sold out. I hope it wasn’t some skinny dude under 180 pounds taking it away from me. Balmora’s set felt like a full-on coronation from the hardcore scene. They covered Laid 2 Rest and a Black Dhalia Murder intro. It feels like a band that is a bridge across all the different sub-sections of hardcore. I can’t wait for new music from them.
3. Restraining Order and Their Cover of Step Forward
I have seen Restraining Order many times and will not get sick of it. “What Will You Do” is a perfect song. And it is one of the few bands on the fest where I know the words. What made me love them even more was a cover of Step Forward. I recently got into their first EP in a big way.
And I got to feel like the cool guy for once when I recognized the cover within seconds.
2. Carrying a Tote Full of Zines and Merch During Trapped Under Ice
This one may have been the most annoying part of the fest. I was set on getting zines at the fest. The label From Within Records had three zines that I got right away. I realized I could not just hold onto them all day, so I spent money on a tote bag. I then proceeded to buy every zine possible. Even with a full tote I was not going to watch TUI from afar. I was relatively close and even at the front for the end. It was worth it, even though I knew someone was probably annoyed at my presence. I was just surprised I did not lose any of my purchases.
1. Ladder Getting Thrown During Suburban Scum
I would be lying if I didn’t put something from the pre-show on this list. Most of the bands playing were not my thing. Heavier hardcore is a small portion of my diet, and I can be picky. I had already seen Suburban Scum in August. But I cannot deny them as a live presence. As the last song came on, the singer started throwing water bottles, and I knew something more substantial was coming. I saw the ladder, and it was within a straight line toward me, and I ducked. I could not passively watch with my arms crossed. It was memorable, and at least now I know what to expect if Suburban Scum plays again. It is another reminder that the kind of music I decide to spend most of my free time with has some element of danger. It is part of the appeal. I walked away without injuries, so now I have a funny anecdote.
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